dazed and confused

like always.

well i had an irrational mini panic attack in class about my freaking timetable schedule and having to organise stuff on my own. having days where your schedule is practically full for the whole term and you can't even book an appointment to see a doctor for my incessant troubles (this being one) also isn't exactly fun. and it just gets worse when u have to wake up super early + travel super far just to get to one place to another. ok and i also recently got a job. well getting a job might sound fun but when the guy said "congratulations" to me i genuinely felt distressed because i actually have no idea if i would be able to go through this or not. but i dont want to look like a weakling and drop out of anything that i've promised to. also, getting some cash rn would be a good idea to fund my stupid extravagant spendings. :/

everything just kind of hit me today and it just sounded really stressful in my head so what more can i do than to panic lol. sigh maybe i just rly need to get my head sorted out.

hopefully i'll make it through.

maybe i should try to meditate as frequently as possible. :/ im just rly confused and idk what to do/say anymore...... sometimes i just feel like im floating in a dream and one day i would just like wake up and feel more alive and grounded.

or maybe this is just me - exaggerating again.

Just so I dont forget

f33lz.

: ( m ak e s me wa n na go b a ck to ja pa n.

AAAH. :') 

L O V E T H I S

there must be a lot of unhappy people out there. :/ : / :/

http://www.manrepeller.com/2017/04/signs-youre-getting-older.html

THIS.

I know I'm not 30 years old but I am getting older and I have been thinking about this a lot and just yes.